because you have to continue getting involved in difficult situations
to show off that particular gift, and I'm not interested in doing that anymore.
~ Carrie Fisher
Eventually, you start to wonder if your expectations of life have drifted off course. You start to crave the peace of mind that comes from not expecting everything to be a challenge to overcome. You try to demonstrate a new mindset, but it's difficult because the average of your thoughts is still stuck in being a survivor, and a survivor needs something to survive. Is that a kick in the head, or what?
So, how do you let this mindset go? One possibility is to accept that it is not necessary for you to "give" in every situation. Yes, survivors often get caught up in convincing themselves that they have to give everything they have or they're being exploitative of situations or people. Plus, the push to survive conjures up a tremendous amount of energy, and it has to go somewhere! It is not unusual for a survivor to burn themselves out in certain circumstances because they cannot find a place of harmony among those who feel no great responsibility to give and are perfectly happy to be on the receiving end of life.
Carrie Fisher's advice is good. Make the decision that you're not interested in being the one who is charged with reconciling difficult situations. Don't be the one who steps forward when no one else will. Be the one who chooses to live your life from the wisdom of your heart and to live an authentic life, and look for places where you can give without strings attached.
and to do so with some passion, some compassion,
some humor, and some style. ~ Maya Angelou