Category: Psychological

Stop Wallowing and Wake Up!

9/2/2015

Can you remember what you were thinking when you got up this morning? Can you give a name to how you were feeling? Very few people can remember what they said and did the day before. Thoughts and feelings are conveniently shoved into the same mental and emotional library. We think and feel the same things over and over and never notice it.

This behavior is like a habit because we act without being consciously aware. Being a creature of habit is essentially being someone who is averse to change. Yet change is necessary if we are going to increase our consciousness. We cannot coast through life or hide behind "business as usual." Often others will call such behavior to our attention, but it is still hard to bring it into the light, so to speak.

We have to learn to be mindful of our thoughts and feelings because these are the geneses of our experiences. We cannot afford to pretend that our mechanical ways of dealing with life are harmless. It keeps us asleep, and it is imperative that we wake up.

Are you miserable? Wallowing in that misery, rehearsing all the things that brought those experiences to you will only bring more of the same. Be mindful. Examine your choices. Accept that change will not happen overnight. It will take as much time and energy to change your habits as it took to create them.

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Whose Fault Is It?

7/23/2015

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You are on this planet called Earth to learn that what you experience is your own fault. Taking responsibility is not easy because a person has to think outside the box, and it’s much more comfortable to use the learned emotion called blame.

Blaming other people for the experiences in your life feels good. The problem is that when you blame others, you lose the creative power you have to change what you create.

Give up the idea that there is such a thing as accidents. There are no accidents. Whatever you experience is created by you.

Remember, this is the planet of lesson, and You are both the teacher and the student.

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The Food of Impressions

7/2/2015

Are you getting the idea that you are not living in a world of conscious people, but rather experiencing the result of the interaction between their subpersonalities? Good!

Although the subpersonalities take turns using your body, they do not thrive on the same kind of food you do. They are energized and sustained by impressions.

For example, let's say that in a room full of people, there's an individual who is dominated by a subpersonality which has a need to feel superior. What kind of impression will feed it? Well, it will seek out a person dominated by a subpersonality which thrives on the impression that they are inferior. In this way the superior one is able to feed on the impression that they are better, and the inferior sub-personality will feed on the impression that the other person is better than they are. So, both the superior subpersonality and the inferior receive the impression they need to survive.

I have become more aware of my feelings when I am in a group. Who makes me comfortable? Why do some people bother me? Who do I spend time talking to? Who is it that I can hardly wait to get away from? I'm always asking myself these questions. Try it! Asking yourself these kinds of questions can expose the hidden agendas of your subpersonalities.

This exercise is just the beginning. To quote one of my favorite teachers, Maurice Nicole:

It's a marvelous thing to find you can move in new directions internally and escape from this spurious invention of yourself.

Just say to yourself: "Why am I always like this? Why do I always feel like this? Why, in short, am I always the same fixed person, with the same points of view, the same attitudes, the same little unpleasantness, the same judgments, the same dreariness, the same criticisms, the same thoughts, the same reactions?"

Now you know this is called: "The realization of one's mechanicalness," and this [is also] called: the first stage of Self-Remembering."

Why? Because it means that a person who begins to see internally his or her mechanicalness has already separated something from what they have taken themselves [to be].

The Grudge – No, Not The Movie!

6/10/2015

Letting go of a grudge you have against someone can be a knuckle-chewing challenge. It can block your peace of mind until you think you're actually being haunted. I finally decided that I had to let it go before I drove myself crazy with it. Deciding to let it go was a heck of a lot easier than actually letting it go, I have to admit. But, I found a method that worked for me, and I'd like to share it with you.

My first step was to convince myself that everyone is doing the best they can – at least based on the understanding they have at that moment. If your grudge is against your parents, this is especially meaningful! What I'm saying is that I had to give the person I had a grudge against the benefit of the doubt. I had to say: "What they did made perfect sense to them, even though it seems deliberately hurtful to me."

Think this first step might be a little too hard for you? Then try this. Reverse positions with the person or persons you have a grudge against. Think of something that you did in the past that made someone angry at you. Did your behavior make perfect sense to you at the time? Of course it did! Do you wish you had done something different? Probably, if you had time to think about it.

Can you see that what you were doing represented the right thing for you to do at that time? After all, you were giving expression to the level of understanding you possessed then. Maybe today you are a better, wiser, and more wonderful person. You might not respond the same way. Let's hope not. Let's hope you learned something from that experience.

The question you need to answer now is: Can you give the same kind of tolerance to the person or persons you hold a grudge against that you have just given to yourself?

Work with this question until even though you remember what happened, you cannot generate any feelings associated with the experience. When this happens, you are on your way to completely letting go of the grudge.

Who Is Speaking Now?

4/12/2015

You are never alone because the power to live a better, more prosperous life is staring back at you from a mirror. It’s true that you live in one body, but you have attitudes within that are in a constant battle to speak through your mouth. To add more interest to the mix, they each have their own idea of what’s right and what’s wrong. This is why if you find yourself emotionally reacting to what someone else says, before you speak, make sure you know which attitude is trying to speak through your mouth.

Surfing The Rift

Learning to heal rifts or disagreements that pepper relationships of all kinds, including the one with yourself, that can make it difficult to move forward.

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John Dean Williamsen teaches about psychological balance and how to use your life experiences to achieve balance.

Surfing The Rift Blog by John Dean Williamsen is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Stop Wallowing and Wake Up!

Whose Fault Is It?

The Food of Impressions

The Grudge – No, Not The Movie!

Who Is Speaking Now?

Surfing The Rift

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