Category: Spiritual

Conquering Loneliness

8/13/2015

Finding a significant other has become big business. Maybe you've noticed the commercials on TV that offer people, old and young alike, the opportunity to find that perfect soul mate. Finding someone "special" gives vent to the belief that states, "when I find my true partner, my loneliness will be over. My life will be full and fulfilled." But, if you are lonely, it's not caused by just being alone. The problem often lies in your inability to make a connection with something within you, rather than in bonding with someone in the world.

So, loneliness is not the result of not finding the right person "out there." Loneliness is a state of being that is caused by an inability to make a loving connection with part of yourself. In other words, this inner separation creates the vibration that spawns the experience of outer separation.

The companion you seek is not really a new person to be met, but a new depth within you to be discovered. The greater the degree of your awareness of this, the more power you will have to attract the perfect helpmate or draw supportive love from present relationships.

So if you are lonely, the place to start is not being on the lookout for that special person. The place to start is looking within for a new connection with yourself.

Over the years, I have observed a number of people, who after doing everything they could to find that special person, found them when they stopped looking. Why? Because, whether by accident or on purpose, they turned within and made peace with a long-ignored part of themselves. They found peace, and peace is just another name for God. Once they were in that state of being, the perfect person was drawn to them.

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Whose Fault Is It?

7/23/2015

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You are on this planet called Earth to learn that what you experience is your own fault. Taking responsibility is not easy because a person has to think outside the box, and it’s much more comfortable to use the learned emotion called blame.

Blaming other people for the experiences in your life feels good. The problem is that when you blame others, you lose the creative power you have to change what you create.

Give up the idea that there is such a thing as accidents. There are no accidents. Whatever you experience is created by you.

Remember, this is the planet of lesson, and You are both the teacher and the student.

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Who Is Speaking Now?

4/12/2015

You are never alone because the power to live a better, more prosperous life is staring back at you from a mirror. It’s true that you live in one body, but you have attitudes within that are in a constant battle to speak through your mouth. To add more interest to the mix, they each have their own idea of what’s right and what’s wrong. This is why if you find yourself emotionally reacting to what someone else says, before you speak, make sure you know which attitude is trying to speak through your mouth.

Recognizing My Unique Path

4/5/2015

What I overlooked for so long was that I always had the key that opened the door to the sweet spot, but It was like my nose—so close that I looked right past it. I kept listening to how other people found theirs. Selling their experiences may have made them rich, but it only led to disappointment for me. The way they thought and felt was unique and special to them. All the training and education in the world could not create their sweet spot in me! You are different than I am. You have unique mental and physical processes that are unique to you. Each of us is different, and so the method that is designed to make you or me successful requires our own uniqueness to make it work. We have to go through our own process, our own discipline, to find our sweet spot. Perhaps the greatest pipe dream is thinking we can use someone else’s mental and emotional work to show us the path to success. It sounds great until we try to put it into practice.

It almost sounds like I’m saying that listening to what others say about spiritual growth is a waste of time, but I’m not. I am simply saying that attempts at self-improvement must be filtered through your own thoughts and feelings in order to establish the harmony that reaches for your highest good.

Finding the sweet spot within yourself is the key to better relationships and experiences in your life. Whatever your relationship with yourself, it is the cloth from which the pattern of your life is cut. Your life will mirror back to you the relationship you have with yourself. If you believe yourself to be inferior, you will draw to you people and experiences to support this. This is true for every attitude you have toward yourself. So, if you want to experience Life’s Sweet Spot, that place that gives you joy each and every day as you wake and go about your business, start by finding that sweet spot, that place of harmony, within yourself.

Creating Balance Within

4/1/2015

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So why is it so hard to create this balance within ourselves, this sweet spot? For one thing, we fail to recognize the consequences of mimicking others and embracing their attitudes as our own. We fail to see the buffers that come into being because we don’t want to see how absolutely ridiculous some of our beliefs about ourselves and the world are. We fail to see that we have turned over the control of our experiences to all those “false personalities” within us that we’ve created for dealing with different situations in our lives so that we feel more comfortable.

Until we accept that the experiences we have—the good, the bad, and yes, the ugly—are all there for a purpose, we will never be able to hold onto this sweet spot within ourselves. Being born onto this earth is not about having a place to live. Earth is a giant classroom. The teachers are not flesh and blood. The teachers are experiences.

We can tell how well we are learning the lessons by the discomfort we feel and how often we return to the same experiences time after time. I never liked the idea that anything less than success was my own fault and that it was a waste of time to blame life, other people or my past experiences. However, accepting the responsibility for your own experiences is a condition you have to face if you are interested in personal change. It takes an extremely brave soul to say, ”I am responsible for the conditions in which I live.” It’s much easier to play the “blame game.”

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Why Bother?

3/29/2015

Why should we try to find this sweet spot? When we follow the path where we look for our answers in the world, it keeps us from expressing ourselves fully. As Teilhard said, “We are spiritual beings having a human experience.” When we fall victim to our conditioning, we operate without full awareness of what we do or how we feel about what we do. We mimic those around us and live our lives through all the roles we’ve taken on during our lifetime to fulfill our needs. If we continue to do this, we have turned everything on its head—we have become human beings trying to have a spiritual experience.

Every experience in your life and mind is the result of harmonizing vibrations. Whatever state of mind I possess, whatever level of harmony or disharmony I possess, determines the kinds of experiences I draw to myself. If you recognize this, you can see why it is so important for you to seek this sweet spot within yourself. It is what generates the quality of your world.

Let's Define "Sweet Spot"

3/25/2015

Before we go any further, let's define this “sweet spot” I keep mentioning. To me, this sweet spot within myself is when my thoughts and my feelings are in complete harmony and partnering for my highest good. This is a gift from God – the ability to come into this sweet spot and create that which is my highest good.

We lose this sweet spot because we don’t have the awareness when we’re small to say no to the influences of those around us. Consequently, we condition ourselves to look for answers in the world. Of course, the answer to finding that sweet spot, that harmony between our thoughts and feelings that makes us feel whole, can’t be found in the world. This starts a vicious cycle for most people. They hustle to find the “right” relationship or the “right” job, and for a little while, they think they’ve found it. But the world can never bring your mind and heart together. So they drop that relationship or that job and hustle to find another.

It is a glorious moment when a person recognizes that they need to look within if they are going to find the right relationship or job because it’s only when we create harmony within our thoughts and feelings that we will succeed in finding those things we seek in the outer. In other words, we have to take responsibility for the change necessary to feel happy.

A Scary Idea

3/22/2015

Here is a scary idea. The drive to find the right relationship or the right experience is the hidden desire to find the sweet spot within yourself, which I mentioned in an earlier post. So don’t waste your time looking “out there.” It is a feeling that does not spill from any experience or any relationship out in the world. Here is something that might be hard for you to get their mind around. The only purpose outer relationships or experiences serve is to act like teasers to keep you refining the creative power you have within yourself. This relationship you forge within yourself is the most important relationship because it is like having a partner who can bring you anything you desire and I do mean ANYTHING!

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Surfing The Rift

Learning to heal rifts or disagreements that pepper relationships of all kinds, including the one with yourself, that can make it difficult to move forward.

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John Dean Williamsen teaches about psychological balance and how to use your life experiences to achieve balance.

Surfing The Rift Blog by John Dean Williamsen is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Conquering Loneliness

Whose Fault Is It?

Who Is Speaking Now?

Recognizing My Unique Path

Creating Balance Within

Why Bother?

Let's Define "Sweet Spot"

A Scary Idea

Surfing The Rift

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